What the meaning of the word "friend"? If we look up for the word in the dictionary, it will generally describe the meaning as "a person other than family members, spouse or lover whose company one enjoys and towards whom one feels affection". Pretty simple meaning, isn't it? For me, the word "friend" has a further meaning for it. Do you think someone who just cares about you is a friend? Do you think someone who shares secrets and experiences is a friend? Do you think someone who gives suggestions and advices is a friend? Actually, a friend will always tell you when he or she thinks you're worse in some ways, but always casts it that way, never as a statement of fact. It's a fine but important distinction. If I say "you are worse than anyone else" to a friend, it must be understood that this is my opinion only.
Of course, anyone in this global society can be your friend. No matter how old they are, male or female, which religion or race they belong to, or even what social and political statuses they hold. However, friends are often divided into two groups, the "good set" and the "bad set" of friends. What makes them being classified as "good set" or "bad set" of friends? The "good set" of friends always the ones who are not just care about you, but they'll also criticize you when you do something wrong, which can make you a better person in life. Of course, the "bad set" of friends will do the opposite way to you. They'll give you peer pressures to make you smoke, involve in truancy, involve in drugs, and waste you a lot of money. A principled person can think twice and weigh pros and cons to ensure which "set" of friends they should follow. Commonly, they'll always choose the "good set" of friends.
Not just humans can be better friends in your life, but pets can also be your friends. Researchers found that someone who's lived alone with his/her pet are generally happier than the one's who doesn't have a pet. Pets can entertain you when you feel alone. And of course, you can also hug or play with your pet when you're sad. And that's the benefit you can get if you have a pet as a friend.
But there is something I would like to ask you. What is the meaning of being someone's friend? Whether if you belong to either "good set" or "bad set" of friends, you should have already known the answer. I do have friends, and I've asked this question to all of my friends at school. Unfortunately, all of them still didn't have the answer for this question. Actually, being someone's friend is not as easy as you think. At times, friends, especially Asians, tend to be shy to speak out their problem (I'm also an Asian, of course). Whether you like it or not, we can use a method to hear their problems. That is, to have an effective counselor's session with a friend or more. Of course, we don't have to be a professional counselor to do this. During a counselor's session between us with our friends, we do want to talk like Oprah Winfrey. But make sure you don't laugh over their problems, or you'll get a smack at your face - I promise.
Getting bored of the word "friend"? Actually there are ways to call your friend such as "mate" in Australian English, "bud" and "buddy" in both Canadian and American English, or even "chum" and "pal" in British English. Of course, you can also call your friend "boyfriend" and "girlfriend", depends to the gender of your friend. In Asian society, however, people always misunderstand the term "boyfriend" and "girlfriend". A few weeks ago, I was waiting for a train with my friend, who is a boy, at a train station. Suddenly, another friend bumped into us.
"Yo, who's this boy? Is he your brother?" he asked.
"No, he's my boyfriend at school, a classmate." I simply replied.
Foolishly, he frowned and turned away as fast as he could. I could tell that he was shocked at that time and he didn't dare to talk to me ever since. However, lots of classmates at the tuition center asked if I'm a gay a few days after and I found out that guy had spread the gossip. I've tried to explain them not to misunderstand the word "boyfriend" but my words have fallen into deaf ears. As you can see above, the words "boyfriend" and "girlfriend" do not just mean "lovers". Think again, does the song "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne means she wants to be other person's lover? I know the MV (Music Video) looks strange, but that's the way to attract people to watch the video. If you look closer at the lyric, it actually means she wants a friend but not a lover. She's already had one.
So what is the meaning of the word "friendship" anyway? If we look up for the word in the dictionary again, it means "the condition of being friends" - In positive way, of course. Friendship is the bigger statement. Lots of people are lovers but aren't friends. Lots of people are relatives and aren't friends. Lots of people work together who aren't friends. You can appreciate or admire someone, but that doesn't make them a friend. We're relatively casual about the word, but sometimes things happen that take the casualness out of it. When I had my near-death experience two years ago and the following long recuperation, I had a lot of time to think about what makes someone a friend. If they are scared of you when you need help, sorry, that's not friendship. If their attitude is "for better or worse," if they stick by you through thick and thin, that's when you can tell it's friendship. I do have some friends, but not as many as I thought. I've lost some friends but I've lived perfectly well without them. And the lesson has stayed with me, vividly. So I'm wary of supposed friends who tell me they know what I need to do to straighten my life out.
How do friendships begin? If you are thinking of introducing yourself to a silly bunch of strange little kids when you were little, you are actually thinking in an absurd way. Friendships happen anytime, anywhere. It starts when you meet the person for the first time, greeting "how do you do?", shake their hands or bow and understand their personal lifestyle, family, and life experiences. Of course, eye-to-eye contact is very important too. In Sociology, it's a respectful way to do an eye-to-eye contact while shaking hand with other people, meaning "I'm neither above nor below you".
Finally, maintaining true friendships are really important. Think of a quote "Friendship is like a set of puzzles, losing a friend is equivalent with losing a piece of puzzle and it can't be found again". All of all, being someone's friend means "the laughter and cries, the winning and losing, and the thicks and thins you've gone through with your friend". Only then, we can join hands with our true friends and sing along to "Viva forever, I'll be waiting..."
0 Commentaires:
Post a Comment